Giving Your Brain a Break from Porn—And Why It’s Important for Healing
Giving Your Brain a Break from Porn
If you are struggling with or addicted to pornography, you probably know the tremendous power it can have over you. While you might really want to stop engaging in this behavior, you find yourself going back to it over and over like a bad habit. If this is you, you may want to consider giving your brain a break from porn so you can see things a little more clearly and find a place of healing. Let’s talk about what this break looks like and how it can help you recover.
What Does a Break from Porn Look Like?
Here, a break can be defined as gaining some distance from the addictive or unwanted behaviors you find yourself doing repeatedly. In this case, if your struggle is pornography, it would mean ceasing this behavior for a certain amount of time. Something very important to consider is that whenever we stop one behavior, it is helpful to find something to replace it. An example of this would be instead of viewing pornography when you have an urge to use it, try going for a walk or picking up a book to read. This may feel very challenging at first, which is completely normal, but as you continue, you may find it becomes more habitual in a positive way.
How Can Having This Break from Porn Help?
Doing the same thing many times over creates an automatic process where you could find yourself doing behaviors you may not even enjoy anymore. Having some distance from this automatic process can be very helpful in allowing you to evaluate what you actually like doing and what you don’t. Giving your mind time to recover can help you see things more objectively, which gives you the opportunity to say, “You know, I really don’t like this aspect of what I am doing anymore”. It is in these moments you can find yourself feeling empowered and able to make a choice that is best for you.
Another thing with pornography is the reality that you may go to it when you start to experience negative feelings. Over time, this can numb you in a way where you don’t actually have to face these feelings. This makes so much sense because none of us like to feel pain, but at the same time, working through what is underneath is important for healing to occur. So, as you give yourself a break from porn, you may find that the negative feelings that need to be dealt with start to surface. While this is likely scary, if you have someone you trust to talk about these feelings with (e.g., friends, recovery groups, therapist), it can be healing.
If you are looking for a change in your life, having some distance from certain behaviors and getting help can be a huge first step. I also want to be abundantly clear: if taking a break from pornography feels impossible to you, or you are not sure about whether you actually want to stop, a therapist at the Center for Integrative Change can meet you in that place.
About the Author
Alex Primo is a licensed marriage and family therapist at the Center for Integrative Change. With training in EMDR and additional training in Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy, he finds great joy in helping men break out of the cycle of unwanted sexual behavior, and helping couples restore trust and intimacy. When he is not seeing clients, he enjoys playing board games with his family, learning magic tricks, and rooting for the Dodgers.
